Home sweet home

We have a home!  

Hey, it could be worse...

So, we moved, we survived.  I don't really want to go into all the details, nor am I going to bore you with pictures of the messy process again. I don't even know why we take those pictures; who wants to be reminded of that?  I will however get real pictures up as soon as I get around to it (hows that for commitment?).

Okay, two months later, I'm finally getting around to adding a real picture of our new house. Or at least the front door. Lovely isn't it? I love the roses.

I'm still getting over a terrible case of bronchitis (which the dr. was convinced was pneumonia, but the chest x-ray was inconclusive) which I'm sure was caused by all the wildfire smoke in the air combined with my weakened immune system from the stress of the move.   I think I get sick just about every move. Anyway, Now that we're settled, I'm finally back to blogging again.  Yay!

By the way, this was number 14 for us (15 if you count moving in together after we were married).  Yikes!  I'm surprised it went as smoothly --okay actually I'm not that superstitious.  And it was only smooth compared to the move exactly one year ago, (find that story here). One funny story though -- although this probably just shows what an airhead I am --  and I say funny, because I can laugh at it now, but at the time I balled, because I just couldn't handle it...

So after weeks of searching, I found a suitable rental for us to live in.  In fact, this particular property management place had several that seemed to fit our needs, and I could apply for them all with only one application, and one fee!  There was one in particular that I felt really good about and so had one of my good friends who lives in the area go check it out for me (long-distance house finding is such a pain, I'm glad I have friends here at least).  She liked it, I liked it,  and once our application was approved, I decided to choose that one.  One of the other possibilities happened to be just down the road, but I decided against it because it was a little more expensive and there were no trees in the backyard.

Well, when we got here and got the keys to go look at the property right before signing the lease, we drove up to our new rental and found that there were people living in our house!
Okay, so that was the first thing that crossed my mind anyway.  The second, and more rational conclusion I finally came to prompted me to look at the keys they had given me.  Sure enough, it was for the other house on the same street, just one number of the address was different.
I don't know where the mistake happened along the way, whether it was my fault or theirs, but what a shock!  I mean, I had been prepping the boys by telling them about the few features I knew about the house --like for example: the purple carpets, and the nearby bike path, and I had even thought ahead for once and changed our address with the post office and all our banks and such to that address. *smacks head*

Well, obviously we couldn't kick those other people out, and the property management place refused to work with us when it came to the higher rent, saying that if we didn't want the house, they'd sell it to someone else tomorrow.  (Yeah, they knew the position we were in --car full of tired kids, all our stuff in a truck, and a storage unit that needed to be emptied that day.)  They wouldn't take any responsibility for the mistake whatsoever or even be sympathetic. Grrr.

The happy ending is that we find ourselves in a really nice house actually.  In fact, our stuff is almost too shabby for this place. It's newer and bigger than the other, with automatic sprinklers, and I figure we won't mind not having any shade in the backyard during the winter --I might not even have to rake leaves this Fall.

Either way, we have a house...with a roof, and walls, and doors, and that's what matters.  The kids love having a room separate from the baby, and I love having a room period (yeah, the futon in the living room wasn't really doing it for me).  Not to mention our own bathroom and walk-in closet --which are two luxuries we've never had and I hardly know what to do with all this space!

It's finally starting to feel like home, and although I miss the beautiful mountains and cool fresh air and all our friends in Wyoming, I think we'll be happy here.  :)

At least until we move again next year.   :P

A Day Just For Me?

Not really.  But a day where I am reminded of my new identity that started almost five years ago.  It's an identity I cherish.

This Mother's Day I had the opportunity to realize how motherhood has made me a better person in many ways

I have become...

More grateful for the little things --like sleep, as I was allowed to sleep in mother's day morning.

Less concerned about appearances --as we were late for church after enjoying the delicious pancake breakfast my husband made.

More frugal and resourceful --as I wore a "new" shirt which, like most of my clothes, I found at the thrift store, and later made a  dinner out of the few ingredients we had in the house since we went on a date and I didn't get around to shopping the night before.

Less selfish --as I allowed my children to eat the chocolate gift I had been given.

More loving as they teach me by example how to communicate love.  Their hugs, their kisses, their sweet words as they tell me, "I wuv you so much."  It melts my heart even on the hardest days --

...because of course, there are hard days.  And those have given me opportunities for improvement in areas I thought I was doing pretty good in, like patience, ,and anger management,

Most of all though, I realize how much my heart has expanded to include all these little hearts; their cares, their fears, their dreams  --all of which have become as important to me as my own, if not more so.

My heart is full.

Progress

Not bad for a phone camera eh? Still, a new one is on its way. Yay!

Do you ever have those times when your life feels like you're walking up a 'down' escalator?  Or that for every two steps you take, you slide backwards one?

We went to the sand dunes for a small family outing.  It was fun, but man those last three yards to the top were about the end of me.  It was super steep, and with every step there was a mini avalanche that would bury my feet and shoes and I'd find myself standing just about where I started.  If I hadn't had the baby strapped to my front, I probably would have tried crawling on all fours.

Luckily, my wonderful husband (after already pretty much carrying the two boys to the top) was there to hold my hand and support me as we struggled together to the top. He didn't just cheer from above, or even just reach down and pull me up to join him.  He was right there next to me helping me, as he struggled to keep his footing as well, and together we made it.

Since our third child has joined us and I've been dealing with health issues, as well as possible post-baby emotional issues, life has felt like an uphill struggle.  Whether it's housework, or callings, or lifestyle changes, or keeping up with three kids ages four and under... my life often appears as an impossibly steep mountain that threatens to bury me with each step.
Luckily, I don't have to do it all by myself.
I've been so blessed to have a wonderful husband who isn't above helping me with what some may see as "my job."

He could come home from work and say, "Well, I've done my job, time to relax!" and scorn me for not doing my job very well because the house is messy or dinner's not ready right when he comes home.  Or he could see me floundering and piously think, "If we could only trade jobs for a day, I'd show her how it's done..." and maybe blitz the house for good measure to make it look clean (getting angry when it doesn't stay that way for very long) all the while acting like a martyr.

No, I am proud to say my husband is truly amazing. He is right there in the trenches with me.  He cleans, does laundry, gets up with the children and feeds them breakfast so I can sleep in, watches them so I can go grocery shopping alone, and he even reads them scriptures and puts them down at night.  (Sheesh, this is making me feel a little inadequate.  Just to be fair, I am usually feeding the baby at those times, and I'm the one getting up in the night with the kids).  He has even come to grips with his original misconceptions that once something is cleaned it will stay that way forever, and learned that 'my job' is an unending one.

I would feel really inadequate if I thought he did all those things better than I do, but he's so thoughtful and considerate of my feelings that he occasionally makes mistakes, like breaking dishes and setting stains and putting the kids in mismatched (if not each other's) clothes, just to make me feel better.  :)

Someday, I'll get back on top of things, and be able to help him be the amazing English professor that he dreams of being.  However, I'm so glad that he chooses to put his family first.  --and to all those students waiting for their unit one papers...  just be patient, he's a lot more lenient when he feels like he's neglected you, so no more whining.

Hey you.  Happy 6th anniversary.

Who Needs It Anyway?

Notice anything different about me?

I don't have a gall bladder!


Yeah, so as we were moving ... like on the way to our new home in Idaho, I started having another pain in my stomach area.  At first I thought it was just indigestion from the Wendy's I had eaten, but honestly, if that is what indigestion really felt like, the people who get it all the time would shoot themselves.  By 1:00 in the morning, I was in the E.R.

They sent me home.

After doing some tests, the doctor was sure he had found my problem --a raging UTI (raging was their word).

Now I may not be an anatomy major, but I think I know where my bladder is, and it is not up under my ribs where this pain was emanating from.

So, I took his pain prescription (some narcotics that made it unsafe to breastfeed my baby) and the doctor referrals (although they didn't do me much good since it was Sunday) and went home.

Well, the powerful pain meds didn't do much, and I spent the whole day writhing in agony.  We called around to the other doctors offices, and to my brother who's a doctor in Washington, and got the same answer.  Everything points to the gall bladder, and we should have had some imaging done -- an ultrasound or something.

So, we went back to the E.R. and demanded an ultrasound.

They admitted me for immediate surgery.

Although there was no infection, my gall bladder was terribly inflamed and there were several stones.

Great, more stones.  But at least I felt validated once again.

Can I just say to that E.R. doctor, "I TOLD YOU SO!"

So I just spent the last few days in the hospital again.

So now you ask, "What did you do with your three children while you were supposed to be moving in to a new home and your husband was supposed to be starting his first days of work?"

Well, that's where the blessings come in.

So, I know I was feeling a little whiny the last time I posted, I hope this doesn't come across as more of the same... but no, that housing never did go through.  We wasted $80 and a week of our lives together on that, but it didn't pan out.  I finally gave up and went back to a place we had found weeks before --luckily it was still available-- and within one day, it was ours.  My mother came and helped me pack and clean, my husband came home and we filled the moving truck, and we were off.

Well, if we had gotten that housing that we had been trying for, and moved on the 11th like we had planned, my mom wouldn't have been here when the gall bladder attack hit.  I honestly don't know what I would have done without her.  She was a Godsend, and I'll be forever thankful for all her hard work.  I mean, it was enough that she packed my things and scrubbed my walls and floors, but then she drove my car to Idaho, sat with me in the E.R. in the middle of the night ...twice... and while I was gone took care of my children and got up with the baby all through the nights to feed and change him. Oh, and she did my laundry and dishes the whole time she was here.

That was definitely a tender mercy of the Lord.  The fact that she could even come and stay for longer than planned, was truly a blessing.

We've had so many blessings.

We were more than lucky.  The attack could have happened earlier in the day on that long car ride to Idaho, and I would have been in misery the whole way. I was completely worthless the moment I got to our new place-- not being able to do much beyond lying on the floor in pain.

I don't know what we would have done without my husband's brother and his wife to help move boxes and furniture out of the moving truck, and to give us a wonderful dinner that lasted two days.

I'm so grateful for my sister-in-law who came to take my two older kids for a day so my husband could get things moved in and my mom could get a rest.

I'm also grateful for my in-laws who are coming this weekend to take care of us for a few days.  The kids love them, and it will be a welcome distraction.

There were so many little things too.  It just so happens that we live a block away from the hospital, which made it a lot easier to find.  I'm also so glad that the baby took a bottle and formula for the first time so well, since I had never tried before this weekend. People from our Church, who we've never even met, are already set up to help take the kids while my husband is at work as soon as the in-laws are gone too. What a blessing!

Someone might ask, "Why did all this have to happen right now, at the worst possible time?" and feel that I've been very picked on.  I admit, I might have thought something like that once or twice... but you know, difficult things just happen, and there is really no good time.

I'm just glad that He softened this difficult time with so many blessings.

Pod Mostem

On my mission in Poland, I lived in an apartment that was right next to a big bridge that went over a major river.  We were kind of below and to the side of it since it was raised up with small shops and parking lots underneath it, but the only way I could describe where we lived in the language was to say that we lived "pod mostem," or beneath the bridge.  Well, one day when I used this expression, some Polish people laughed at me.  They explained that to say you live "pod mostem" was to say you were homeless.  I don't think they could imagine an American being homeless, since all the Americans they knew were quite wealthy by their standards, not to mention that most of their knowledge about America came from Hollywood.

This is the actual bridge in Warsaw. This was practically the view from our front door.

I saw so many homeless people in Poland.  So many begging on the streets, or sleeping on cardboard boxes in the train stations.  It was a big eye opener, and really put things into perspective.  It made me more grateful for what I had, but it also made me really wonder why I had been so blessed.  Why had I been born in a free country, to a family who loved me, and had the blessing of the restored gospel?  I actually felt guilty sometimes.  I mean, what had I done to deserve it all?  I really have no reason to ever whine.

I've been feeling kinda sorry for myself lately.  I've been way stressed out because we were supposed to move this week, but the housing situation we are trying to get into is taking longer than we anticipated.  It's still not a sure thing, and time is running out.  If we do get it, we will be lucky if we can move in next weekend.  In the meantime, my husband is going to have to leave me here all alone, with two kids and a brand new baby, to pack up our house while he attends orientation meetings and such for his work.  He'll come back just in time to help us pack the moving truck and drive back there.  Honestly, just having a new baby and two toddlers is enough to overwhelm me, but to add all that on top of it? ...yeah.

So today, I am counting my blessings.

1. At least we have a home.  We're lucky to be able to stay here until the housing goes through ...and it's free!  What a blessing!
2. At least I have a husband.  Even though he'll be away, it's not a permanent thing --I couldn't ever imagine being a single parent.
3. We are so blessed to have family and friends nearby that can help out, whether it's a grandmother lending my husband a car so he can get where he needs to be and not leave me car-less, or a mother who can come and help me with the cleaning and packing, or neighbors who can watch the kids, or family to help us move in to our new house.  We are so blessed.
4. At least I have my health.  Now that the kidney stone and the pregnancy are over, I'm glad to be free of pain, and am starting to feel a little bit of my energy come back.  Sure, I'm tired all the time from lack of sleep, and still recovering, but overall I'm feeling good.
5. My kids are healthy too.  In fact, they're a little too rambunctious and energetic for me these days, but I wouldn't have it otherwise.

I could go on about money and freedom and the gospel etc., but this has served it's purpose.  Now I don't feel so sorry for myself.

Isn't it great what a little gratitude can do?

Oh yeah, one last thing.
6. At least I don't have to cook dinner tonight because it is being brought to us by members of our ward.  The Relief Society sisters have been bringing us dinner every other night for the last two weeks since the baby was born, and it's been wonderful!

I have to admit, I didn't have that with the last two babies, because 1- we moved right after our first was born and I don't think anyone knew about us, and 2- I was too stubborn and proud to allow people to help with the second.

I've learned my lesson though.  Bless and let bless.  I love making dinners for other people when they need it.  Why should I deny myself the blessings others would like to share, and why should I deny them the opportunity of blessing us, and receiving blessings themselves? --just so I can show everyone that I've got it together?  that I can handle what I've gotten myself into? that I can do it on my own?  That doesn't make any sense.

This time though, I don't pretend to have it all together, and I'm not exactly sure what I've gotten myself into, and I know I can't do it all on my own... but I do know that this is what the Lord intended for me, and He is helping and will help me to do it-- mostly through the service of others.

Not only am I not homeless, but I'm also not alone.

Why am I so blessed?